I am so frustrated with everything right now. I really don't feel that anything is ever going to get any better. I'm tired of having to fight this battle alone, and not getting any where. All I am asking for is support and I am not getting it. And for what ever Colleen seems to think that telling my mom about my eating disorder is going to cause my mom to want to support me more. Well guess what I seriously doubt that is going to be the case. I sent my mom a text telling her about the past 7 months of my life and my eating disorder treatment. And I haven't heard anything. I doubt that I will and I hate this, the only thing that I am asking for is support and I am not getting it. I want to stay with the eating disorder, it seems to be my only friend the only thing that will listen and support me.

I don't feel that anything has changed regarding my eating disorder behavior and that is really frustrating. I am still taking diet pills and laxatives and weighing myself multiple times a day. I am hoping to lose X amount of pounds by June. I wonder if is possible to lose 20 pounds in a month. Well it can't hurt to try can it.